Connecting with Beyond Ex-Gay
If you are a member of the media who wants to speak with someone about a possible radio or television interview, please use our contact form for an initial contact. If you are on a tight deadline, please see our contact page for a media phone number. Please be advised this goes directly to the phones of our facilitators (and we're scattered in different time zones), so please keep that in mind.
If you are a member of the press writing a general story about the ex-gay movement, see if any of our articles, narratives or Survey Results could be helpful to you. If you want to speak with an ex-gay survivor directly, you may use our contact form and we'll see if there's anyone we can put you in touch with. Keep in mind that many, many survivors will not want to speak directly to media. The health and well-being of our group of survivors is of tantamount importance, and so outside of the main facilitators (who are more than happy to share their personal stories), it may take a while for us to direct you to someone who is willing to speak openly about this.
If you are an ex-gay survivor who is looking to connect with others who have similar stories, check out our community page and see if that might be a fit for you. You might find our FAQ page, articles, or some stories from other people helpful as well. If you haven't taken our survey, please consider doing so. If you're interested in seeing some of the results so far, you can see all of that here. It can be overwhelming and triggering though, especially to read the pages of individual responses, but it could aslo be helpful to see that you are not alone. Take it in small doses! If you want to start writing your own story, check out the bottom of our narratives page as there are some guiding questions you might find useful.
If you are someone who went through ex-gay ministries and are not sure how you feel about it, or you are still involved in a ministry, or just not sure where you fit, a recommended place to start is our FAQ page, articles, or some stories from other people. You could also look at our Survey Results to see other people's experiences - especially the questions where people wrote personal answers. We've listed as many as possible. Hopefully you'll find some food for thought there to help you figure out where to go next.
If you are a former leader of an ex-gay ministry, you might be interested in seeing the apologies some other former leaders have made. It can be a tricky thing to try to process your experiences, knowing that not only do you have to think about the possible effects of the ministry you once led, but also to process your own individual story. Just take one thing at a time. Concentrate on what you need first. You can't process anything about anyone else's experience until you have made some progress with your own. It is possible that we could put you in touch with other former leaders if you wish to discuss this. Contact us if you're interested in officially joining the apology, or contacting other former leaders.
We cannot provide individual counseling services. We are just a group of survivors doing this in our spare time. We encourage everyone to find a safe place to talk, even if you have to do some work to find that safe space. Whether that is with an affirming therapist or pastor, counselor or friend, local LGBT center, facebook group, counseling group or church, that can be a good first place to begin. If you identify as Christian, you might find The Gay Christian Network to be a helpful place, or an affirming church in your area. If you're looking for a therapist, try to find one who works with LGBT people, and if necessary, direct them to this site if they need more information about the possible effects of ex-gay therapy. A local LGBT center might be able to provide reliable recommendations as well. Many LGBT centers also have support groups that can be helpful. Generally speaking, we will not know of specific resources in your area, and you are better off contacting local affirming churches, LGBT centers, or doing some internet searching for your area.
If you are a student and are writing a paper or research project about ex-gay therapy, please take the time to read as much of the information on this site as you can. You can gather quotes (you must credit them properly) and stories via our articles, narratives or Survey Results. Please remember that the people who have shared their stories still retain the rights to those stories, and please respect their willingness to share honestly and don't abuse their trust. We most likely will not be able to speak to you personally, but you should be able to get a wealth of information from our site. If you have read and researched all that you can, and still have a question that has not been answered, please use our contact form to ask a question.
If you can help us in any way, please check out our Participate page.